Monday, February 22, 2010

Life is About Choice

Sometimes choosing is not soooo easy. We have to know what we really want, really need, or anything. It's all based on our primary, secondary, or any other needs, like desire, dream, so on.

Just today my friend asked me to go to the place which I think it's gonna be my next destination after I graduate. He said there's a very big event going on there, a hindu pilgrimage. And that pilgrimage occurs four times every twelve years! I really want to go there! I really do!

But then I remembered that I have many things to be done here. So I have to choose.

Then my choice for now is, I will stay here, finish everything, and then go to that place! I'll see. :)

Life is about choice. Sometimes we have to postpone (just don't give up) the most interesting thing to do in our life for something more important.

And nothing's wrong with that. :)

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Change of A Lifetime

Life changes, people change, places change, and everything changes. But how do you know that they change? How can you tell that they change?

Recently, I’m back to the place where I’ve been two and a half year ago. Here still looks the same, well maybe some changes here and there, but only small changes. But I know, this place –after I left some years ago­– has been witnessed many things; people who came to this place; events that were held in this place; everything. But the place stills the same. Same!

And I meet the family who lives here. I still remember them, seems like only yesterday when I first knew them. But now, they don’t even remember me. Because too many people come to this place, interact with them. Even after two and a half year, they still look the same! The mother looks the same, maybe only the little girl; she is taller now and calmer. But the rest, same!

Same like me, same like you. Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and asked yourself, what have changed in me? Maybe your hair is longer or shorter, maybe you’re getting taller or bigger, maybe your skin complexion is more black or white, maybe you have scar now, maybe you wear glasses or braces now. You can tell that easily from your reflexion that you see in the mirror. And if you meet people from the past, they will only tell your changes in appearance! Nothing more! Though maybe over all you still look the same.

But if you ask yourself again, do I change? For this, you need to relax and let your memory back to the past to recall what you have been through, what you have learnt. Those things might change you from inside. You might become smarter or dumber, more wisdom or more reckless, more open-minded or more narrow-minded, anything. Or might be you stuck and feel the same because you still dwell in your past? What side are you on? You choose! Your life is in your hand.

But if you know how good it is to experience things –good and bad– in life, you would like to have it. The more you experience something, more that you can learn. And how you react for every situation depends on your life background, your frame of reference, your knowledge, your environment, and your experience in the past. Because of that, no need to be afraid or worry about what will come in the future. You can predict it from your present, but life is a big surprise. Just embrace what comes toward you.

Though if you fail or make mistake in your present, it’s normal. You would never learn if you never make mistake and you would never know how it feels to be success if you never fail. Same like, if you always success, you would prefer to die if you fail. It’s cliché, I know. But it’s true.

Don’t be afraid of failure or to make mistake, even it’s painful. Every pain can make you stronger. Sometimes maybe you can’t stand the pain, it’s only because you never experienced it before. That’s why you don’t know how to deal with it and handle it. And like Queen said “Pain is so close to pleasure.” And every pleasure can make you feel grateful for everything that you have in your life (unless you become snob instead, hehe).

So look at yourself again, ask yourself, “What have changed in me?” It’s only you who know the answer, the right one which comes from inside.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Traveler's Hangover

Traveling is addictive. If you like it also, maybe you would say, "I never want to stop!" Same like I do.

For me, I really like the feeling of away from home, away from my routines, away from the system. Sounds pretty coward, eh? But well I'm still alive even I'm coward. hehe.. It feels strange to be home again after all. Strange! But I don't feel sad, and of course I don't feel happy either. Sometimes I just don't know what I supposed to feel when I'm home. All I know I just want to travel again. So mostly the feeling of going is more frightening than the feeling of leaving. Though adapting with home's circumstances is not that difficult, since adapting is the thing that travelers always do.

When I talked about this with my friend, Roberto, he told me, "So do not travel again." I was shocked, why he told me like that? He's away from his country as well. But then he explained to me that I should not do what makes me feel unhappy. He said I like traveling, but I don't like to be back home. But I should go home. So everytime I'm traveling, possibly I would feel unhappy after it.

I couldn't say he was right, but he was not fully wrong either. And everytime I ask myself why I travel? I can't find a satisfying anwer yet. I know I'm looking for something, but I don't know what. I'm looking for something I don't know (like ED always say also). Envy them who can answer this question already.

But all I know I feel happy when I'm traveling. But yeah, not when I have to go home. It's all about what's in my mind. My mind is more free when I'm traveling, but not at home. Seems like there's a conception in my mind about home and what's inside it already and I can't change it!

Though I can't change it, I have to change my mind about it, change the way I think about it. So it could change the way I react with that. I should enjoy myself wherever I am. Because in the end, (maybe) it's the same to here or there. And the most important is that I -and you also- should be happy. Because why would we choose to be unhappy?

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Nice to Meet You

I love traveling alone, but in fact I never be alone. Because I always meet new people when I'm traveling. I love to meet both locals and tourists.

My traveling experience is not that much yet. But from that I already learned a lot that makes me want to learn more and more. A friend told me, "Maybe one day you would experience this. In the end it's the same to be here or there, to travel or settle down. What makes it different is the people. People you meet, people to share with, people with a good heart who want to be friend with you not because you're a tourist, but because you are you!"

The last 4 weeks when I did my Thailand and Vietnam trip, I met some wonderful and awesome people who made my days more beautiful. :)

Pai
Phine, Georg, Christian
They were very nice. And it was funny, because they were the last people who knew me and Ed as a couple, and they also the first people who knew that we were no longer couple anymore. ;)

Rickard
I supposed to take pic of him with ukulele, instead of this tobacco.
He was Ed's old travelmate, they met up coincidentally in Pai.

Paul
This guy is fucking tall! Even taller than any other westerners.
Aom
She's a singer. Her voice is unique. She sings beautifully.

Ladissa
She's a good dancer. She also can sing!

Martin
He looks like Chris Martin, eh? Crazy guy!

Bangkok
Roberto and Diego
They're a great team. They always complete each other. And they know how to value someone, they have beautiful souls inside. People with good hearts.

Tiap and Nii
Hard to tell that Tiap is not a girl, she's pretty. Nii is an artist, she's wonderful!

HCMC
Christophan
He and his friends showed me HCMC around within a day. From upper class to working class.

I don't know her name. I met her through Chris. She can't talk because she has mental depression. So I used sign language when I talked to her.

Damian
Stayed in the same room in dormitory. He's very talkative. He always have something good to talk to.

Liesl, Lisa, Laura
We did a lot of walking, talking, and eating. Because of Spanish Bar, Cu Chi Tunnels, and oreo creamy shake.

Patrick and Ronan
Paddy's motorbike was cool! But police pulled me over when I was riding this motorbike. And Ronan loves small cute dog. ;)

Hopefully see you again. Someday, somewhere. :)

More picture from people I met.

Tomorrow Never Knows!

My last stop was Saigon. After that I had to go home. I was only away for four weeks, but when I had to go home, I didn't know what I supposed to feel. I didn't feel happy, but I didn't feel sad either. I just didn't know. It's strange to go home, and well, it's sad because it means you stop traveling, though only for a while. And like it or not you have to face the real and daily life back home.


I like the feeling when I'm away from home. Everything new, different, it's interesting. And when I don't know something or make mistake, everything is pardoned. When I have problems, I have to handle it by myself. There's no one that I can count on but me. I learn how to be tough, to think clearly, to spend money wisely, to adapt with new circumtances, to observe people behaviours, to understand and appreciate differences. It really is a good feeling and traveling is addictive!

Well, tomorrow never knows and life is a big surprise. Life back home is another adventure though. So I have to face it as well. I just have to stop for a while then soon I'll go again to new places! Wait for me! :)